This is a post that really deviates from the original topic, just so you know.

I suppose if you watched Ed, Edd n Eddy a lot as a child, you might've thought at first that I was talking about the good ol' Plank in that show. I don't know why I still remember that. Ed, Edd n Eddy was never one of my favorite cartoons. Guess it's always those odd little things that stick with you after all these years. Sometimes I'll just be sitting there, and it'll hit me all of a sudden...I remember things that I'd forgotten for many years. It hadn't seemed like much to me before, having enough time to read books and play Pokemon games and draw on my hands with washable markers. Back then I'd taken it all for granted. I always hated being told how lucky I am and how I should be grateful. I never understood it back then. But now I think I'm starting to.

This year's French class seems to have a focus on boards. We were able to use a SmartBoard one day. It's pretty cool that you can move stuff around with your hands and "write" on the screen (I suppose it's kind of like a giant tablet). But after that we haven't gotten to use it again. I wonder if there are other classes using the SmartBoard. Or maybe it's stored away somewhere, collecting dust. I often get the feeling that the decision-makers in my area don't make such wise decisions. The library has got some new check-out machines, which save time because you can check out multiple items. All you have to do is stack your items on the machine and it'll check 'em out for you. It is very cool, but did we really need to toss away all those older machines? They worked just fine (well, most of the time).

Well, anyways, back to the subject of boards - quite recently, my teacher passed out white boards for us to use. It sure is nostalgic having them again. I think the last time I got to use them was in 6th grade, and even then it was only rarely. In elementary school, I thought it was really fun to write or draw on a whiteboard, and I wanted to get one myself. When I finally did get a whiteboard for at-home use, I ended up hardly using it. I don't really spend much money anymore because this syndrome is so common for me. I seem to lose interest in things once I have them. But when I've lost what I used to have, then it hits me that I should've appreciated it.

The past seems so beautiful now, even with all its pitfalls...And the future often looks so bleak. I've been wondering for a while now what I'm really doing. It's required by law to go to school, so I can't really worm out of it (my parents can't homeschool me; they have to work, and they're not really good enough at English. And they don't really know any history or cell biology), and I have no idea if private school would be more fulfilling (not to mention the hefty price!).

I love to learn. But going to school is so exhausting. Each day I have to squeeze all the juice out of my brain, have to pay attention when people are talking to me, have to smile even when I don't feel like it... (And even then, one of my friends told me that I should smile more, which was very surprising to me. Several years ago, I was told by someone else that I looked like I was always happy, even when I was angry. I guess things have really changed since my childhood.)

There are lots of things I want to do, and yet here I am, glued to the spot for the next four years. Some days I'm feeling cheerful, I have energy and optimism flowing through my veins. But other days I'm in despair, because it seems like such a waste. Four years when I'm still young...I could be pursuing all those dreams of mine. It's such a waste. Such a terrible waste.

It's especially painful because a lot of things are my own fault. I didn't hang on to my old friends. Maybe it's inevitable that people will grow apart. But there are times when I could've made more of an effort, been more considerate. Sometimes I've been cruel or unsociable on purpose, just to keep people away from me. I've been very selfish, and I still am. I discover sides of people that I really don't like, to the point that I want to detach myself. Or I'm too cowardly to get close to someone because I expect that I am only going to lose that person. It has happened many, many times, and it will surely happen again. But the choice is mine: Will I take the risk? Or will I throw away the chance to befriend someone who might turn out to be a soul mate?

Labels: cartoon, choice, class, ed edd n eddy, french, friends, future, money, myself, past, people, school, smartboard, tired, waste

Since the beginning of this school year, I've taken to studying while playing piano so that I can save time. One of my teachers has said time and time again that students shouldn't multitask, but I feel like playing piano and reading information at the same time helps me to think better. Sometimes I come up with good ideas while I'm practicing piano, so I like to keep my binders propped up on the stand that you're supposed to put the piano sheet music on. Problem is, when I put pencils on there too, they have a tendency to roll off or get knocked off.

The pencils fall into this crevice between the cover for the piano keys and the main structure of the piano. I can never get them out after they've fallen in, so I had no idea for a long time what had become of my pencils. (I assumed that at least they hadn't broken the piano, since it still seems to work fine.) It was only recently, when I happened to drop another pencil in there, that I made a bigger effort to try and get into it. I saw where the pencils had fallen, but I can't reach it because my hand is not small enough anymore (ironic, since my hand is quite small, it hasn't grown for several years, and I had thought I would be able to fit it). And we don't have anything that is both thin, flexible, and hard that we can grab the pencils with and pull them out. I wonder if they'll stay in the piano forever. Perhaps someday someone else will come to own this piano, and they'll open it up and see those pencils inside. Something that was once of not much importance could become artifacts for future generations to find.

But there are more treasures than just objects to be found in the piano. Learning to play piano is frustrating in the beginning, and it can be painful in the end too (if your hands were somehow made unable to play piano in the future). I really think, though, that there's a lot to be said for playing a musical instrument. You will have to practice a lot. You can't give up as soon as you think "I can't do this, I'm just not good at it." I think that it's good to have something to strive for, to work towards perfection. Perfection may not exist, but you can keep improving yourself and get as close to it as possible. And your goal when you're playing an instrument may not be the same as mine or someone else's. What I hope to do is play beautifully, and to show my emotions through the music. I don't know if I've reached that stage or if I ever will. But I'll keep trying. I don't want to let go of the piano. Not the way I did with the flute and cello. I can't play either of them anymore.

I don't think you ought to keep playing an instrument if you really don't enjoy it, though. There is no way to be certain that you won't eventually come to like it, but if you want to quit, go ahead. Even if you come to regret it later, it ought to be your own choice. I remember meeting a girl who said she didn't really like to play piano, but her mom made her do it. Why? Because the mother think her daughter will be embarrassed later when she's the only one amongst her friends who can't play the piano. It's fine to be proud of your musical skills as long as that isn't the reason you're playing... I really don't think you ought to play an instrument for the sake of pride. Play because you enjoy, play because other people enjoy it, play to relieve stress, play because you want to get better at it...But please, don't play just to save yourself embarrassment.

Labels: artifacts, bad habit, choice, enjoy, fall, future, giving up, ideas, learning, lost, motives, multitasking, music, pencil, piano, pride, struggle, studying, treasure

There's lots of things on this planet that are unique to it. The most obvious one is, of course, life, for as far as we know, Earth is the only place with living things. But having all this life also has its downside.

Like all the waste.

I'm sure you've seen some of it. Dog poop left next to sidewalks because dog owners don't bother to pick it up. And most certainly your own waste in the toilet. (I know it's disgusting to talk about that, so I won't dwell on it.)

And not just the sort of waste that animals naturally have to get rid of. Us humans have really changed. We used to live as hunter-gatherers. Then we figured out that we could use plants to our advantage by planting them on purpose and raising them until we could harvest them. Eventually we didn't have to think about survival all the time, so we were able to explore other things that interested us. We drew and painted, we sang songs and made instruments, we came up with religions and we tried to treat diseases and we came up with all sorts of inventions to speed things up. We wanted more time to ourselves. We came up with the printing press so people wouldn't have to painstakingly copy text. We hitched carriages to horses, and then we came up with cars, trains, and planes. We turned from writing letters to calling each other on the phone to emailing, and nowadays many people send text messages.

Faster, faster, faster. It's all getting too fast now, I think. I feel like there's never enough time. Everything is rushing on by. I used to be such a big fan of Pokemon. I used to await every new game eagerly, counting down the months and weeks and days. Now I don't even know about the most recent starter Pokemon. I got caught up in other things and didn't have the time to keep up with Pokemon anymore. I guess I gave up. Sometimes if I have the free time I'll pick up an older Pokemon game like Pokemon LeafGreen (which is for the Gameboy Advance. Do you remember when that was the main handheld for Nintendo, back before the DS came out?). But other than that, my old devotion for Pokemon seems to have died. It's only ever stirred up again when I see something on the Internet that makes me remember those good old days.

And since we always keep replacing our older things with newer stuff, the old things get forgotten. We leave them to collect dust in our houses (I am very guilty of that) or we throw them out. All of it really does pile up. We've got so much of it in some places that you'll see nothing but trash. The Earth is big. But don't forget that there are many, many people, too. And all those things we threw away and gave up on have to go somewhere. They stay right here on this planet. They don't magically wink out of existence, and it's not like we send all our trash into Outer Space where we can forget about it.

You don't have to become a vegetarian or never buy anything ever again. Just be a little mindful about what you do. If you see some trash on the ground or if you have some of your own, throw it away so it won't somehow get into a river and get eaten by a whale who will later end up washed up on the beach with a bunch of plastic bags inside it. If you see something and suddenly feel an urge to buy it, think for a moment whether it's something you'll treasure forever or if it's something you'll buy and never touch again. (I used to be pretty spendthrift, but nowadays I hardly buy anything. But that's mostly because I want to save money now so I can retire earlier) If you're taking a shower, even if it's cold and you don't want to get out, be a little braver and step out. (This is definitely something I need to work on.) And if drink bottled water, switch to a reusable one. I'm doing that myself in the near future.

If you have some time to spare on a weekend, don't just sit in front of your computer screen and go on the Internet, which is what I'm doing at the moment. When next September rolls around, you might want to consider taking part in cleaning up a creek or beach or some other waterway (I did that just the other day, for a school project, and thought it wasn't bad. At least it's fun to get to hold one of those trash grabber things). You'll get some fresh air and find some rather interesting garbage lying around. Just do a little something...To save the world, or to feel good about yourself, or because seeing waste is such an eyesore, or, as I would say, because you're alive and you ought to do more than just take up space. I've been doing that for all these years. But at least I can still salvage the future.

Labels: change, coastal cleanup day, earth, future, help, humans, invention, memories, planet, pokemon, speed, stuff, time, trash, waste, water bottle

Is there such a phobia? Because I probably had it, not long ago.

A week from now, on Monday, I will officially make the move from middle school to high school. It's a change that I have been feeling uncertain about. It seems like the clock will really be ticking once I enter high school. My mother is now pressuring me to take classes and study for the SATs and attend seminars. And now I'm being urged to...

- Talk to my teachers (which is a bit hard for me, since I'm not that outgoing as of the past few years and I feel like it's really shallow to befriend your teachers just to get a good recommendation letter for college)

- Make a "professional" email (I don't want to have to check three different emails. I already hardly check one of them - and besides, I figure I'll get spam mail if my real name is in the email's name. And I would really be angry if people were judging me by my email. I know, in this world, first impressions can mean everything, but that doesn't mean I have to like it.)

- Attend extra classes outside of school (my mother insists that a lot of other people are taking them and I have to in order to keep up. But I don't like the idea of that either, because it feels like I'm using money in order to get ahead in school. Just because other people are doing it doesn't mean it's right. Well, I suppose I may be the only one who has such warped and illogical morals.)

- Stop wasting time on the Internet (that's something I intend to work on myself. For instance, I am planning to quit Crunchyroll. Maybe not completely. I might come back once in a while, but I will probably stop visiting on a regular basis. I've already started to think of my "farewell" message. It's painful for me to leave something behind, but not as much as I would have thought a few months ago. It's time to move on. I no longer want to be chained to it.)

And I don't really know what to expect of life in high school. Back when school was still in session, all of us 8th graders went over to the high school campus (it's pretty much across the street, so it's nearby) and listened to some people talk about various parts of the school. They encouraged us to join clubs and participate in leadership activities and whatnot. Near the beginning of the session, the students said, "Well, I bet you think from what your siblings and friends have told you that it's all about studying." Then they paused, and added, "Well, it is sort of like that..."

I certainly hope not. In this country, what with some of the best universities being located here (Harvard, Stanford, Yale, Princeton, MIT, UC Berkeley, UC LA, Brown, Cornell, Columbia, Dartmouth, Pomona, Northwestern...), the competition gets too fierce. If you ask me, it's like in middle school they're preparing you for high school, and then in high school they're preparing you for college, and then in college you're being prepared for...Your job? The rest of your life? I'm not really sure. (As for when you've got yourself a steady job, I think you're just waiting for retirement. XD) I have heard that some of my fellow students have been taking classes during the summer, such as Geometry, so that perhaps they can move up a level in math and will not have to take Geometry in high school. (I don't see the need to rush. Why not take it easy? You should be able to take Calculus by your senior year if you just go the grade level route.)

Well, I'm sure there's a lot more to high school than just studying for tests all the time. (It's not like I study as much as I should anyways, since I often think to myself, "Eh, I'll probably end up studying something that isn't on the test. I'll be wasting my time.") But I have no idea what everything else is like either. I've looked at the school lunch menu and read the policy, but what does that really tell me about the people there? How can I know what I've read in novels really reflects the high school I'll be attending? Will it be similar to middle school or a whole different universe? I guess the only thing that can be done is to experience it for myself. I am no longer afraid, or at least less so than before. But I'm not completely looking forward to it, either.

Labels: change, classes, college, crunchyroll, email, expectations, fear, first impression, future, high school, internet, judge, life, moral, preparation, quit, SAT, studying, teacher, uncertain

For several years now, I've felt like I have obligations to things that I have started (and later regretted doing so). Mostly it has been websites. I would join a website, perhaps out of curiosity or because of a friend's recommendation, and for a while I might be enjoying myself on the site, but after some time I would grow bored. In some cases the site was not important to me, so it was easy for me to quit going on it. But in other cases, I had spent a long time building up things on my account that I had become proud of, and I didn't want to leave because I was afraid all that hard work would go to waste. And I ended up weaving a kind of spiderweb around myself, trapping me in an endless routine of visiting websites, making it feel like a chore and not something done for fun.

It happened to me with video games as well. I used to brush my dogs in the game Nintendogs every day. I kept them in good condition - they were always in the hygiene state of Beautiful, they were always fed and given water, I took them on walks every few days (to go to the discounted shop to buy dog food, water, and collars), and I trained them until they could easily win the Agility contests (which allowed me to make lots of money). In fact, I earned enough money to be able to remodel my house all the way to the most expensive kind, which gives you a view from Outer Space.

I really didn't want to abandon my dogs because I feared they would run away (they run away if you neglect them too long, and I prided myself on never having a dog run away) and because I thought all the work I had done, every day, for years, would become meaningless. It was only when I had to prioritize my activities (and Nintendogs was one of the ones I decided to sacrifice) that I stopped playing the game. (And anyways, my DS screen was ruined from all the brushing.)

Indeed, I am still playing Animal Crossing: Wild World to this day because of my annoying sense of obligation. I turn on the game once a day in order to water my plants. I have cultivated a vast garden of flowers. I also used to spend much time in making money, which really did pay off, because I was able to expand my house to its utmost capacity. (It has three floors - there is one big room and three smaller rooms on the first floor, one small room on the second floor, and the third is a basement type of thing where my "people" sleep) Always, always, always, I feel like I can't possibly part with these things, however material and shallow they may be, because of all the time and energy I devoted to them.

But I know, with a sinking feeling, that these things must eventually be put aside... The older you get, the less time you seem to have (or at least, you have to spend your time on other matters). And I fear eventually I will not have the time to even water those flowers, that they will all turn brown, and wither up and die, and weeds will take over my town. I am sure this has already happened for other gamers, who have grown bored or simply cannot find the opportunity to play anymore. And I am unwilling to buy Animal Crossing: City Folk, the newest of the Animal Crossing games, because I don't want to become interested and motivated, and then have to give it up - it would sit, collecting dust, like many of my Gamecube and some of my Wii games. I feel terrible now for having wanted video games, when I really don't use them much and they do cost a big chunk of cash. That money could have gone to worthy causes, or even to my retirement, which I moan and sigh over so much.

Eventually, I know I must disentangle myself from the trap I have laid around me. I need to learn the lesson of being able to give up certain things, without worrying so much over them the way I am wont to do. I wonder if it's just a part of my nature and I won't ever be able to overcome it. I really hope that is not the case. It unsettles me to think that things are impossible and that the sky really is the limit.

Labels: accomplishments, age, animal crossing, fun, future, hard work, human nature, letting go, money, nintendo ds, nintendogs, obligation, problem, sacrifice, time, trapped, video games, waste, website

Soon I'll be going on a school trip to Yosemite, where we will spend our days hiking and writing in our "journals". There's a lot of things that I needed to buy for this trip, because I'm not much of an outdoorsman. In fact, I've never really been camping out in a tent, seeing as my mom prefers civilization (and I guess I would really miss indoor plumbing, myself). But it'd still be nice to just try it, you know? For the sake of having that experience. It's not good to judge something you don't understand.

There's a whole lot of things that I needed to buy for Yosemite, including...
- A sleeping bag (I almost never sleep at other people's houses)
- Hiking boots
- Waterproof pants
- Waterproof jacket
- Snow gaiters (well, I guess I don't REALLY need them, but they're useful to have. They're like half pant legs that you can put on.)

There's probably a few more things that I have forgotten to mention. But anyways, I'll probably never use most of the things I bought for Yosemite after I come back. We don't really go hiking much in the first place (probably because I didn't like to do it...Too hot outside, I usually burned up my energy in the beginning through running, etc. Not that it isn't nice once in a while. In science camp back in fifth grade, we had the chance to hike alone, and it was really relaxing).

One of the things we needed to get was a bandana. Apparently, when we're out hiking, we'll stop to eat lunch, and we'll be using the bandanas as "plates" for our food. I set to thinking about bandanas.

Bandanas seem to have many uses. They can be used as hankerchiefs if you have allergies, you can wear them to look sort of like a cowboy (and you could also wear it if you're sick or people around you are sick as a kind of mask), you could put them on your head...I'm not sure if people usually do this, but somehow or other I got the notion that people who have gone through chemotherapy and thus lost their hair tend to wear bandanas to cover their heads.

To me, this gives the bandana a lot of meaning. The bandana is a sign of struggle, showing the battle between people and cancer and their fight to survive. It is a visible symbol of pain, fear, and desperation. At the same time, bandanas also show hope - a little hope that a person will pull through, fight off the cancer, and be able to resume living their life again. Maybe things will never be the same. Perhaps the scars, physical and mental, will always be there. But it's something precious, getting to have a second chance.

Bandanas are pretty cheap to get, but they're not necessarily useless. I hope you're paying attention things and what kind of purpose they really serve. I guess that's what teachers mean when they're saying, "You should ask under the surface questions!" You should still pay attention at school, even if you find it boring, because you never know, something important might be said.

My history teacher sometimes tells us stories, such as about having to transport a cake, being a valet, gambling in Las Vegas, and so on. He says we should pay attention since there is something to be learned from his stories; they're not just for entertainment. I think I might want to be a teacher sometime.

Here are some of my possible careers:
- Writer (well, that may have to be just something I do in my free time, what with the "starving artists" thing)
- Photographer (again, only if I can make a living off of it. Nowadays lots of people have huge Nikon or Canon black cameras)
- Interior designer or travel show host (too bad those jobs aren't that common)
- Ice cream shop owner (or some other kind of shop, with yummy food XD)
- Fashion designer (it'd be fun to come up with things, and I'd like to steer people away from those really low colors and tight clothing. x_x )

Labels: bandana, camping, cancer, career, chance, chemotherapy, future, hiking, hope, learn, outdoor, science camp, shopping, sign, significance, struggle, symbol, trip, useful, yosemite

This is a valuable lesson that I learned today from my teacher. It ought to be the new Golden Rule. (Well, not really. I'm not all that fond of cars because I get carsick. But that's besides the point.)

More than ten years ago, a young man (my teacher) was going to a place called Jake's to meet up with his friends. He was sitting on the roof of his car when a Ferrari came into the parking lot. Back then, a Ferrari was quite expensive (and still is), $150,000 or something. My teacher and his friends stared at the car, drooling. It was red and sleek, and was shiny, like it was polished often (which is quite a feat, since it's harder for things to look shiny in the nighttime than in the daytime). They couldn't decide whether to go inside Jake's or not. They were hungry, but if they went inside, they wouldn't be able to see the Ferrari anymore. After a few minutes, an old lady stepped out of the car.

"Hello, boys," said the lady.
"........Uh, hello," said my teacher and his friends.
"My husband died recently. I'm getting ready to sell it," remarked the old lady (regarding the Ferrari).
"Oh, what, really?!" At this point, my teacher is rummaging in his pockets for money (though he wouldn't be able to afford the Ferrari anyways).

Later, the old lady gets back into the car. She accelerates a little.
"Awww..." go the boys/young men/whatever you call them. (Just like a kitten's purr, so says my teacher)
Accelerated again. "Ohhhh...."
Went in reverse. "Ooohhh..."
My teacher offers, "Will you be alright? I'll drive you home." (Doesn't matter to him that he'd have to walk home after all, he just wants to be in a Ferrari, something he probably never got to do before)
"Nah, I'll be fine." The old lady drove off...Out of my teacher's life forever.

My teacher then said to us, "Don't let widows wreck nice cars. And treat your car nicely."

Anyways, speaking of cars, I was given some advice about how to skimp on car insurance. You have to pay more for car insurance if you get into lots of accidents. I was told that you should get your license when you're sixteen, and then wait two years or something until you actually get a car. Then when you get car insurance it'll look like you're a safe driver because you didn't get into any accidents for two years. (Obviously, if the folks who work for insurance companies figure this out, they might get suspicious, but oh well. Thought I'd let you know.)

I've always complained about not having life insurance to my parents, but in reality, it's probably better that I don't have it. For one thing, I'm young, so the chances of my dying are lower than those for an older person. And also, some people can't use money that results of a death. (Though there are quite a few people who say, "Well, money is money!" and there are even those who kill people on purpose to get ahold of inheritance money) I wonder if my parents would be willing to spend money they received if I was insured and I died. Would it pain them too much to use money which my life had been the price for? And if you had a dog, for instance, and it died, and you got money as compensation, would you be too pained by the loss of your dog to touch the money? Or would you move on, and put the money to good use?

While I'm on the topic of cash, my school district often doesn't have enough money. One of my teachers complained, "They want us to teach differently, in the 21st century, but they don't give us the money to do it. In fact, they take away money." I know it can't really be helped, because California is a state in debt (as is the whole US of A), but it's annoying. Most of the people who make decisions are not students anymore themselves, so it doesn't really matter to them if they take away the money for schools, even if children are the future. (Yeah, I know, school is mostly based on memorization anyways, but still. It's worthwhile to go to school.) If only, if only, there was something that could be done about it. Money is what makes the world go round but it is also what stops it from going round. D:

Labels: california, car, death, debt, ferrari, future, inheritance, insurance, jake's, life, money, problem, school, story, united states of america, world

When my mom's friend and her family came over to my house, she brought a present for my mother. It was a Coach handbag, a black one. I have no idea if she herself is a fan of Coach, but Coach does have quite a bit of fame.

A lot of people in Japan were excited over brand name bags. I saw a huge line of people waiting to get into the Gucci store, it was that popular. (I guess they only let a certain amount of people inside at a time. I mean, that way the people working there can pay more attention to you.) And women in the area where I live also like brand names, such as Louis Vuitton. I see them toting such bags.

My mother says that a lot of the people just like to show off, thinking it will make them look rich or trendy. That's really not the right reason to buy a brand name. If you really like it because of the looks (I, for instance, like anything that is shiny!) or usefulness or some reason like that, then all is as it should be. But it's dreadful that people would think it would make you look affluent to have a brand name handbag. If you saved up money for a long enough time, you'd be able to afford one. Besides, if many people have it, then many people appear rich, which means they aren't rich after all, because it's impossible for everyone to have a lot of money. (Otherwise, our economy is more socialist than capitalist?!)

But teenagers are also caught up in the brand name fashion craze. I overheard some classmates talking because we were having a fire drill and had to go outside and line up, then sit down and wait for the drill to be over. One of the girls had Coach shoes. (I don't really think it's worthwhile to have shoes from a brand that is famous for its bags, since I'm not that fond of the Coach logo thing, but whatever) Another girl noticed and said, "Oh, you're so lucky!" (Or something like that.) But the girl with the shoes said, "Eh, my mom bought them on sale anyways." (Apparently, it was actually her mom's idea to buy them...Or was she just saying that? Who knows?)

Even one of my friends got Coach shoes, as a gift from someone she knew. She was pretty pleased over them. They look okay, I suppose, I'm not interested in getting them, though. Well, whatever floats your boat, right? (That's the kind of attitude I take a lot. I probably shouldn't do that. D: )

It's not always good to accept everything that comes your way, though. One time, in 2009, I was in my old art teacher's classroom. I took Applied Arts in 7th grade, which is Art, Cooking, and Woodshop over the course of the year. I visit her classroom occasionally (though not as much as I did in 7th grade). She told my friend and I (we go together) that she was divorced. She said that she married at a young age. And she told us that when you're in love with someone, pay attention to what kind of things about them you don't like. If you think "Ugh, I really don't like that, it bothers me," then you should probably rethink your future with them. The teacher said that you can't change someone, even if you think you can. Their bad qualities will only get worse. Though it's impossible to find perfect people, you should still pay attention. "Love is blind", so goes the saying, but it doesn't necessarily have to be.

I've always wondered who I will eventually married. I plan on marrying - I'm not going to be an old maid (not that it's necessarily bad; a husband can be quite the hassle). And I want to be married while I'm still young, like in my 20s, because if you marry late, then you'll have children late (I guess I might have a child of my own. Perhaps I will adopt one, and have one related to me by blood). And that's not good. Then your children don't have as long a time to spend with you, to make memories and share the joys and sorrows of a family. Anyways, though I'm getting sidetracked again. I've been wondering about what kind of person I will look for. (I'm already looking, in fact, inspecting the possible people in my area. However, it seems many of them are undesirable.) I've decided some of the traits I'm looking for.
- Taller than me (but not too much taller! That's intimidating)
- Good family background (I'm not talking about being nobility or living in a rich neighborhood or anything like that. I mean, no one goes insane in their old age, the bloodline is not susceptible to dangerous diseases, and such)
- An intellectual (Someone who I can talk to about the mysteries of life, and books, and perhaps video games if they play them. It is always nice, but not required, that the person had a good record in school or won awards, too)
- Musical (Optional. But it would be nice to have someone who could play accompaniment to my piano. Or teach me to play harp. I would like to learn the harp.)
- DOESN'T SNORE (Seriously. Snoring is really annoying. I can't sleep if someone snores.)
- Likes animals (I plan to have a cat and a dog, so this is pretty important too.)
- Isn't lazy (to balance me out, because I'm lazy.)
- Independent, yet interdependent (What I mean is that the person can think for himself and isn't influenced too much by other people's opinion of him. But I also think the person should be someone who is friendly and who I won't feel is drifting apart from me. It's important for a family to be connected, after all.)
- Won't let me give up (on some things, like exercise. I mean, I need someone who will be concerned with my welfare. But hopefully not too bossy. The point is, the person should try hard and keep going till the end)

Maybe I'm too picky. Who knows? XD

Labels: bag, bragging, brand name, coach, desirable, divorce, dream, future, handbag, husband, love, marriage, money, qualities, shoes, snoring, teacher, trend

I don't drink coffee, so I'm not talking about coffee beans. But this reminds me of something from Ouran High School Host Club. The people who go to Ouran Academy are all wealthy, privileged people. Haruhi Fujioka, being a "commoner" and a scholarship student, was to work for the host club to pay back a debt, so she bought instant coffee. The Ouran students had never tried it and said, "Oh my! So it is true that commoners are so busy they can't grind their own beans!" I doubt that everyone is necessarily that busy. Sure, overall most people do have a lot of things on their schedules but if my dad has time to watch movies in the evening then he certainly has time to grind coffee beans. (No offense to my father. But he knows that I think he doesn't do much at work. XD)

Before I start rambling too much all over again, I might as well clarify what I'm talking about. During this summer it was kind of a daze for me, since I was sleeping better and had a lot of free time, so on and so forth. But now I've gone back to school and I have to adjust back to the tediousness of the regular year. And eventually, when I'm working, unless I'm a teacher, I will probably have to get used to it almost forever. It's a rather melancholy thought so I will try not to dwell on it. Already we have homework again, however, and sooner or later I will have to come back "down to Earth".

Today, in fact, was the first day of the 2009 - 2010 school year for me. The first class was history, with, ironically, a teacher called Mr. Brown. This is weird seeing as I have had both Kampps, Browns, and Blairs. (The Kampps are married, the Browns are just...unrelated, and the Blairs are brothers.) It seems like if there's 2+ teachers with the same last name I end up being one of their students.

Overall I think the teachers this year are okay. The impression I got from them...
History - Kind of intimidating, but he is funny. I'm still wary, though, because he said he likes to yell.
Science - I don't mean this to be rude or anything, but she certainly looks old. I wonder if she's about retiring age yet. I know Mr. Brown (last year, not this year) said that the 8th grade teachers are...well...they've got a lot of years under their belts. (Not that they necessarily wear belts.)
Language Arts - She seems pretty cool. I noticed that she is a big fan of the Chargers football team. This reminded me of Mrs. Jackson in the way that Mrs. Jackson is a big fan of the Red Socks baseball team. (She even has a sign that says Red Sox Fan Parking Only on her wall) Anyhow, I have noticed my LA teacher is the most lax when it comes to late work because she accepts it two out of three trimesters whereas the others won't even take it unless there are "unusual and extreme circumstances" (in the words of the science teacher who once had a student with leukemia).
Geometry - I like him even if I did think his voice was just a touch odd at first. He has some sense of humor which is a relief. I heard two of his kids go to my school. Oh yeah, and for some reason the Geometry class is nearly full this year. I wonder why?
PE - This is Mr. Blair. I had him for a trimester last year so I kind of know him already. He always reminds me of Luigi from the Mario video games for some reason. My PE period is 6th period. Strangely, I had 6th period PE for the first trimester all three years of middle school.
French - I can't pronounce her name at all but I'm going to work on it. Though I pale at the thought of learning hundreds, maybe thousands, of French words, I suppose I signed up for it, so I have to deal with it. What was funny was that she bought an hourglass from the Galeries Lafayette in Paris, France, but then it turned out to be "made in China". I bet nowadays almost everything is.

Labels: beans, boredom, busy, coffee, coincidence, daily, everyday, first day, future, grind, high school, impression, instant coffee, luigi, made in china, ouran high school host club, summer, teacher

It seems as if everything is hardy and won't die easily. Back when I went to Alaska on vacation quite a few years ago, I got some free rings which will turn color in the sunlight because of the ultra violet rays. It's kind of like solar energy but used as decoration and not electricity. It was from a store called Del Sol, which can be found in Hawaii as well, not just Alaska. And I think there might have been one in Las Vegas or some other place. You can get t-shirts, bags, and other things which will become colorful under the sun's rays. Anyhow, those rings still work even all those years later. I thought this was surprising. Batteries decay over time but apparently these are still top notch.

I've been reading a book called The People of Sparks. I picked it out for an activity we're going to do in language arts, actually, but that doesn't mean it's not a good book. It's the sequel to a book called The City of Ember. Though some writers have a more sophisticated style than Jeanne DuPrau, that doesn't mean her books aren't meaningful. I'm not sure which book of the series I prefer. (There are actually four books in the series but I haven't read the other two yet.)

In the books, there is something called the Disaster that happened to mankind. People kept fighting over things like religion, food, and land, and there were billions of people and dangerous weapons like bombs and guns and tanks. It got out of control and a lot of people died. Then three epidemics of diseases came and decimated the population further. Only a few were left and some of them went underground to make a city called Ember, which was powered by electric lights. Other people tried to scratch a living on the Earth's surface. One of the settlements was called Sparks. The reason why Ember was started was to make sure there would always be people on Earth. They were given instructions on how to reach the surface, but it got lost over the years until the main characters of the City of Ember found it.

The Ember people and Sparks people joined together since the Ember people had no idea what things were on the surface. (Seriously! They thought "sun" was a word for a floodlight since they'd never seen it before.) They were all weak and pale-skinned and small because they'd lived underground so long. The people of Ember and the people of Sparks didn't get along since the people of Sparks were angry about having to share their food (it's hard to feed your own population, let alone double) and the people of Ember were angry because they weren't getting enough food. Eventually other problems arose, but of course, like most books, it was resolved.

What made me think was how the humans destroyed themselves in the end. I wonder if this could happen to us. Right now we have all these amazing things - air planes, computers, cars, air conditioning, machines to do our work in factories instead of people (well, in China it's mostly people, but that's because of the necessity of providing jobs for so many human beings). But we can't forget what was here before we came while we invent new technology. As said in The People of Sparks, "People find it easier to be bad than to be good. One bad thing leads to another, and worse things happen until a Disaster arises." (Not the exact words, but that's the gist of it.) I wonder if life would go on without us if humans were exterminated, or perhaps it would make a new start again, just like it always does. But what if it didn't? Dinosaurs never showed up after they all died of cancer from the huge meteor that hit Mexico. I guess it's all yet to be determined.

I know this was an awfully long and rambling post about one basic subject. Sorry if this bored you.

Labels: alaska, choice, del sol, future, humans, sunlight, survival, the city of ember, the people of sparks, war

I guess that applies to women too. 'Cuz I was reading So Far From the Bamboo Grove today, because it's our current book for language arts class, and the mother of the main character died. And, as dead people usually are, she was silent and pale and unmoving. (I was having trouble coming up with a post title today, that's all.)

I've been pushed around a lot at school lately and I'm getting a bit annoyed. For instance, when I was trying to get through the classroom door at lunchtime, the kids were too rowdy and I fell backward, tumbling onto my backpack. It didn't really hurt but I was very upset because I was trying not to let this happen. And also, at the lunch line I had to do a bit of shoving myself to get a good place in line because the lunch lady decided she wanted us to go in through a different door than usual. (This was because we moved to a different location today. The geography bee was going on in the ordinary place. I had forgotten about the geography bee, and unfortunately missed it. So I only glimpsed it later through a window. Mr. Blair was talking to the kids; at this point there were three boys and one girl left.)

That reminds me, once I'm in eighth grade I might be able to enter the Scripps National Spelling Bee. I have never been sure if I'm good enough to go far but I always wanted to see. But unfortunately I never get a chance due to me being in the wrong grade at the moment.

Right now my legs are pretty stiff. I've been standing in an odd position in front of the computer because my mom says you can lose weight by standing for half an hour after you eat. I don't really believe what my mom says since she gets these things from Chinese newspapers (Which I don't trust), but oh well.

Today's country in class (I usually don't talk about this but I am not sure what to talk about today) was Singapore. I was looking at it and I realized they seem to have better living standards than China (They make a few thousand more dollars average than USA! And have a much higher HDI, .922, which is basically how clean and safe it is). They have strict laws, though...Which is probably why it's clean.

Here's an example. A kid lived in Singapore and he was feeling naughty so he decided he was going to graffiti a place. He was caught and was to be publicly whipped. But a lot of humanitarian people said that was cruel so there was a big conflict over it. Eventually the guy stepped up and said he did the crime, he would accept the lashes. (Mr. Blair admires him for at least doing that.) He was whipped, certainly, but due to the people concerned about him he was only whipped a few times, in a wimpy way.

By the way, before I forget, here's this week's cooking schedule...After that I'll be "signing off". :)

Monday - Prepare Pizza! (Mrs. Fromm says that's popular with the kids.)
Tuesday - Bake Pizza
Wednesday - Utensils (Don't ask me what that is because I don't know.)
Thursday - Chicken or Tofu Nuggets
Friday - Cinnamon Crisps

Labels: books, cooking, death, future, geography, graffiti, health, rudeness, singapore, unhappy

Don't worry, the sky isn't falling, there isn't an earthquake or King Kong or anything. No, it's my dad, because he brought back an old friend of his.

The friend is just coming here to visit. He will only be here about two days or so. But my parents say I have never met this person (even my mom doesn't know him). And he will be sleeping in one of the bedrooms in our house (we actually have three, but one is normally used as my mom's home office, so most of the time no one sleeps in there). I guess he doesn't want to pay for a hotel since he's only staying here a short time anyways. He's Chinese and wears glasses. He lived in Australia (in Sydney! What a shock). And he says his daughter has a friend with the same name as me. (Bigger shock!)

Anyhow, though, I will have to make the best of it, and play the good child/good host. After all, my mom will shoot me warning glances the whole time if I misbehave. (Well, my mom's not home yet; still on the way from her office building, but still.) My mom tends to be the stricter person in the family. Not to say my dad doesn't also have a short fuse.

Today was a pretty lazy day. We had a quiz on Africa's geography, a quiz on our Animal of the Week in Science (We don't do it every week. Just every once in a while), and review work in math. It was weird in math since the student teacher took over the lesson. He seemed a bit uncomfortable since he always says "Umm" and "Uh" when he talks. (But I guess he's always like that.) Some of our table groups had to volunteer to talk about math problems. We also had a Tips section at the bottom with some important reminders. I wrote "Please give me $50" in that section. My tablemate/friend saw it and laughed, but she crossed it out anyhow. Oh well.

Oh yeah, in the morning, I was with my friends, and one of my friends complained about her parents thinking about what kind of husband she would want, despite her only being in middle school. Then another friend remarked that her parents already had a person in mind. Apparently it was a rich family they knew and the son was smart and tall and didn't wear glasses. Her parents thought that guy was handsome but she just says he's weird. I laughed, and then asked them if they knew a guy called "Anton". They did, and I told them my dad had suggested I marry him (seeing as he is fairly wealthy and is actually in advanced math). My friends were at first in shock, then laughed like crazy. (By the way, does anyone know how he got into advanced math? The only time I ever saw him, I thought he didn't look that...intelligent. Maybe looks are deceiving.)

And then one of my friends starting giving some other friends and me nicknames. She called me Syd (no surprise there, though), and called another friend Lily, and a third one she dubbed Nicky. Nicky says that some people call her Nicky and others call her Nickel. Nickel is very similar to her actual name, but I would feel strange if someone called me a kind of money.

When I was walking home, there was a young boy ahead of me. He was walking home along with his sister, father, and some younger sibling (he/she had to be lifted up as they were quite young and could be too weak to walk for a while). The boy was talking to his sister and didn't notice a mailbox sticking out almost over the sidewalk. He hit his head on the mailbox and it fell open, revealing some brochures and other papers inside it. It reminds me of a time I was feeling naughty when I was young, and opened a mailbox. I took one thing out of it, closed the mailbox, and walked for a while, then placed it in a random person's mailbox. (I felt bad afterward but it's too late now.)

Labels: attention, australia, family, friends, future, mailbox, marriage, math, nickname, personality, school, teacher, temporary

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