There have been myths about the moon. People have thought that sleeping outside under the full moon would make you go crazy, and there are some creatures, like werewolves, associated with the moon. Words have come from the moon, too, like the words lunatic and lunacy.

I fear that my mother may have some problem with her eyes or mind. On Thursday night, we went outside to look at the sky and try to spot the moon because of an astronomy lab I need to do for my science class. After walking around my backyard and looking in different directions, I finally found the moon. It looked rather unusual; The white, sunlit crescent shape was on the bottom of the moon, not on the left or right (which I had expected).

My mom was staring at the moon rather strangely, and later on, she asked me, "Did you see other white things? Not the part at the bottom?" I said no, I had not. I wonder if perhaps her eyes were going bad or if she was hallucinating. (Well, people do see things in the moon, like animals and men and things like that) Nearsighted people don't usually see funny things when they don't have their glasses on, do they? Is this a result of old age or stress?

Time really is passing, after all, and my parents aren't getting any younger - nor is my aunt's family. Once a week or every other week, my mom and her younger sister will talk over the phone or on Skype. This week my aunt talked a little about her son and his birthday party. She and my mom also discussed their countries' policies about retirement and things like that. (She lives in France, and things work differently there.) I guess after years of working, you're counting off the days (more like years) until you get to settle down.

My cousin has already turned ten years old. And I myself will be going on to high school next year. How did this time pass so fast? It feels like so long ago now, the time when my aunt, uncle, and cousins came to our house for a while. Back then, things were really different. I had still been in elementary school, and there wasn't that much to worry about it. In fact, probably the only thing that bothered me at all was the annoying behavior of my cousins. Both of them were rather picky, if you ask me. One of my cousins wanted to eat ramen noodles, so we cooked her some (I think it was just one of those Maruchan ramen packs, where you get a pack of dried doodles and you put them in hot water), but she didn't eat that much. (I hope her appetite has improved. I know her brother has quite the healthy appetite. He even ate more than I did at a pizza place, which is impressive.) At the time she was quite prone to crying when something upset her, though the last time I saw her she was a bit better in that regard (I suppose people do mature somewhat with age).

Well, my pet fish have been aging too, and so there aren't that many of them left. We used to have guppies, once upon a time, but they are all long dead. Now there are only two fish in the smaller tank. We have three fish in the other tank. The big tank, where the three koi are, is by far the most dangerous. If you open the tank, you will see the lid is only propped up on one side, and even that part is unstable. So there has to be another person standing by to hold up the lid AND hold up the black part under the lid that fits in a slot directly over the water and fish.

I was feeding the fish the other night, with my mom holding up the lid. My mom said that I was dropping the food in the wrong place since it ended up landing on one of the fake plants, and the fish have really bad eyesight (and don't have much brains either) so they don't notice the food. I got some kind of fish tank cleaning rod and was going to use it to poke the fake plants so the food would fall down onto the bottom of the tank, where the fish would have an easier time getting to it. Unfortunately, my mom tried to reach for the rod I was holding and in the process lost her grip on the lid of the tank, so it crashed down and bonked us both on the head.

For a while my head was sore, but as I am accustomed to such injuries, I soon forgot about it. However, my mom was still having a headache later on. I wonder if this is a result of old age. Since you can't really make new brain cells, and you're weaker in general, it's harder when you do get injured. I hope it won't give my mother any permanent head damage. But I fear it is already affecting her. She forgot that I would be staying late after school to take a French test and panicked, thinking some tragedy had befallen me. (Luckily, nothing of the sort had happened.) I probably should have reminded her in the morning, but still, I would have thought she'd remembered. This is a very bad sign indeed. If she can't remember something her only child has to do...Imagine if she had a lot of them, like seven children.

Labels: age, appetite, brain damage, cousins, crescent, danger, eyesight, fish, france, illusion, lid, memory, moon, picky, ramen, relatives, retirement, tank, time, young

CORRECTION: Whoops, this is actually the 299th post. My bad.
This post marks 300 posts in this blog. It's amazing how much I've been able to write over time, and I'm glad that I got this far. I hope you've enjoyed the ride too.

I thought I had better back up some of my posts on my computer, in case Blogger ever blinks out of Internet existence or my blog accidentally gets deleted or something like that. I was looking through my posts and I realized I had used the title "Walking on the Moon" twice. Oopsy. I try not to ever repeat post names, but I unintentionally do so... I guess this is what happens when your quantity gets too big. As for the quality, I hope it has not gone down over time. When I look back at some of my posts, I think, "Oh, that was a fun time, but it feels like so long ago." There are some times when I don't have much to write about, like the post "Ansel Adams", when I was lacking for inspiration, and it was a drag to write the post. (I felt like I should write something, to prevent me getting rusty from less practice writing) And there are also times when I have so many things to write about, I'm churning out posts everyday and I feel like I'm on top of the world. I wonder if I can grasp that feeling again.

There's something I'm always wondering about, and that is my appetite. It seems that even if I eat too much at one time and get full, later on I'll feel hungry again. (I might not really be hungry, only as soon as I see something yummy, I feel the urge to eat it.) I guess I have to ration what I eat since it seems I will always get hungry at certain times regardless of how much I ate earlier. This is rather dangerous and makes me feel like a fish or something. I bet my fish would keep eating beyond their capacities if I gave them a ton of food. (That's why I tend to "starve" them by only giving them the bare minimum at feeding time. I don't even feed them daily.)

While I was walking home today, I overheard a girl talking about how her dog had vomited. (Sorry to give you that mental picture if you were eating) I kind of thought about how people really still behave a lot like animals. I've heard dogs can sneeze and cough too (not sure about cats), like us. Both animals and humans scratch themselves when they're itchy. And we certainly do vomit as well. In the end, no matter how humans try to control and dominate and become "civilized", they're still animals.

I remembered something today that I hadn't thought about in a long time. When I was in elementary school, I used to go the YMCA daycare on the campus after school, where I stayed until my parents came back from work and could pick me up. There were sometimes questions we could answer, for instance, since I mentioned itches earlier, there was once a question, "Do you scratch an itch or itch a scratch?" We would write our answer on a slip of paper, as well as our name, and put it in a plastic box. Then, one day, one of the people working at the YMCA (we called them "leaders"), would randomly pick out a piece of paper where the question was answered correctly (I believe it was sorted for correct answers first), and then the person or people chosen would get a prize of some sort. It feels like a long time ago now.

Even sixth grade seems far away. I still have plenty of memories, but they gradually become fuzzier over time, more surreal, more distant. After a while I end up thinking, "Those were great times. And I'll probably never have them again." I still enjoy things in my daily life. But it's rather clouded by all the knowledge of the world you get, because when you're young everything's fresh and simple, everything is clearly defined. The lines get blurred when you're older, unless you can still keep that innocence, and I long for those days when things were not complicated. I don't know if I can have that kind of life again. I think that you don't realize how nice it is to be young until you get older.

I feel worn out of having to deal with stresses and concerns, and that's why I want to retire. I'd thought that if I didn't have to work any longer, and be able to focus my attentions on the little things, things that I want to do but don't get around to doing, things would be easier. Maybe they would be, and maybe they wouldn't. I'd still like to see for myself. And I don't want to wait more than fifty years for it.

Labels: 300, appetite, blog, complicated, fish, food, innocence, inspiration, life, memories, old, retirement, scratch an itch, simplicity, stress, time, walking on the moon, winner, YMCA, youth

Recently, the clouds have been moving back and forth, covering the sun in the morning and letting it shine through in the afternoon...And sometimes the sun is covered by fog, so the light from it is weak. Because of the lack of light, it sometimes appears that people and objects have no shadow, or a very faint one.

I remember once that I heard about someone who had no shadow...Was it a book? Or perhaps an anime? I cannot clearly remember. But that person stood out because they had no shadow.

Shadows are always there, yet people don't really pay much attention to them. One's shadow always follows you around, and imitates what you do, for it is a part of yourself and yet at the same time not a part of yourself. The shadow diminishes and grows depending on light, and although people are taller in the morning than the evening, living things do not wane and wax the way the shadows do.

I am not really sure why I felt like talking about shadows, but I suppose it was just to help me get the writing flow going, if you know what I mean.

For homework, I was supposed to look up George Washington's Farewell Address. (That was the speech he gave when he resigned from the presidency after two terms) It was really long...Well, maybe it just felt like that because I was reading it and not hearing it. Still, it was pretty lengthy, and pretty hard to understand, since it was around the late 1700s... In fact, there was quite a bit of stuff in the speech that didn't have much to do with the President resigned (besides that maybe he was giving the country and next President his advice about the evil of political parties, and staying out of Europe's messy relationships, and such?). I feel a bit of kinship to George Washington, though, because he wanted to stay retired, but had to stop being retired to become President. Also, I heard that the President liked interior design and collected art. (I've been to his house, Mount Vernon. I wasn't overly impressed but maybe I'm judging by the wrong standards. It was old-fashioned, after all, with beds that are really high and all)

I've been to quite a few old homes, like Hearst Castle and Versailles and Winchester House. Winchester House is the most interesting one, I think. It's not too far from where I live and I've been there twice (once on a field trip with a summer camp, and another time for a friend's birthday party) It's got all sorts of weird things like the staircase that goes into the ceiling and a place where Sarah Winchester could look down and spy on her servants (to see if they were gossiping about her or something along those lines? Then she could fire them if they were). Some parts of the house would make you uncomfortable if you're claustrophobic, though. The guides tell people not to wander off and open doors because you could get lost, and never be found...

Another cool place would be Mystery Spot, which I also visited as part of summer camp one year. (The same summer camp that allowed me to see Winchester House, in fact.) It's a place that is really...weird. I forget what caused it, I'm afraid. But sometimes things are sideways and gravity is really strange. That's why it's called the Mystery Spot, I suppose. It's very mysterious.

I had a question, and if you happen to have the answer right on the tip of your tongue (figuratively, of course; if you talked to me I wouldn't be able to hear you unless you're next to me), please enlighten me. I've been looking for a jacket for my coming trip to Yosemite, and I've been wondering what the difference is between "water resistant" and "waterproof". Personally, I think it's the same thing, but my mom thinks that water resistant isn't as good as waterproof. I have no idea. (Unless you don't know either, don't bother looking it up, this is just if you already know it...)

This is something kind of random, but my history teacher has all sorts of odd songs. There was one that seemed to talk about elements (the sort that you find on the Periodic Table), and there was one that was like the 99 Bottles of Beer on the Wall song, and just today I heard some lyrics in a song that went like, "God is great, beer is good" or something. D:

Labels: beer, claustrophobia, elements, george washington, god, house, light, mount vernon, mystery spot, president, retirement, sarah, shadow, songs, speech, water resistant, waterproof, winchester, writing

Today, my mom said that I should put my drawings somewhere so I don't lose them. I definitely ought to, because I once had this great drawing of Lucario (well, I just looked at the Pokemon: Lucario and the Mystery of Mew movie's DVD cover, and copied it, but whatever) and then I lost it! I was really mad over it. Maybe someday I'll find it again, though. Sometimes I do rediscover my old things.

I used to keep a binder with my drawings. I was 9 years old at the time, so the pictures are not so great. (In fact, some of my pictures from before I was 9 are there. They are silly, but they're amusing to look at) It's been so long since I updated that binder. A few of my dad's drawings are in there, too. He draws really good, even if he was only drawing copies of what was in my "How to Draw Manga" book that I ordered from the Scholastic book catalog one year. I guess both of us are better at imitating other people's art than drawing our own. That's worrisome, because I don't want to be arrested for violating copyrights or something like that.

Not that I'm not interesting in going to jail. To me, jail is similar to school, except they have higher fences. I mean, I heard we have the same meal program. That's not fair, because the students committed crimes (uh...as far as I know, at least) but then, criminals are still people and have rights (though some might be a bit kooky). I heard they serve pizza in jail. That's not so bad, is it? But my parents say I am silly for being curious about going to jail because people beat each other up and it can be quite dangerous. Plus, I heard that prisons in my state are getting overcrowded, and one time there was a riot at jail and some buildings were destroyed and people were injured, so I guess I should find a place with a nice jail. Sydney, Australia used to be where the British sent criminals, I think, and there is still an old prison (not in use anymore, I believe) on a very small island in Sydney Harbor... It must've been the jail with the prettiest view in the world.

Back to the topic, though, before I get sidetracked (as usual! I don't really care if I get sidetracked personally, but it might confuse you, the reader). I also dug out my cello the other day. It's not actually my own cello - it was borrowed from a friend of my mom's. My mom's friend's son (well, one of them) wanted to be in Advanced Orchestra or something along those lines, so he took lessons out of school in cello, but he still couldn't give in, so I suppose he gave up and no one was using the cello. So I took it since at the time I was still taking orchestra. I haven't touched it for a very long time so the bow looks ruined, and the strings are really out of tune. Apparently, depending on the temperature, the strings get loose or tight, so you have to tune string instruments every day. Well, the cello itself is shiny still but it's hard to use it since there aren't notches in the bridge for the strings, so if you're not careful the strings at the very sides could actually fall off the bridge, and then you would to have to put them back on. Very annoying, and scary too. I've been urged to take cello again but I'm not sure if I should yet. For one thing, I am afraid to find out whether I even know how to play reasonably well anymore. And I only did take Beginning Orchestra, so although I have knowledge of music (from playing piano all these years), would I still be able to do vibrato, or hold the bow properly?

I think someday I have to get over that fear. I don't know when that day will come for me. It could be fifty or sixty years from now, when I am retired for real (although I really want to retire, it's unlikely, like WHO WOULD PAY FOR MY EXPENSES? My dad says he will give me his money, but he wants to retire as well).

I'm an easily distracted person, and sometimes I start thinking, and old memories that I had forgotten for so long come back to me. (Thus the title for today's post.) For instance, my carseat. I used to always have to sit in one. It wasn't all that long ago. Maybe third grade or so... I think I started to sit without a carseat in maybe fourth grade? (Hey! Maybe that's why I started getting carsick! I didn't have a carseat any longer) I wonder where it is now. Is it in the garage? Or has it been given away? Sometimes I think it's so weird how I could forget about something that I had for so long. But then again, I guess people are always preoccupied with their current lives and don't have that much time to think about the past. It's kind of sad that way. Life is so rushed, and technology actually seems to be making it busier instead of less busy...

Labels: australia, binder, carseat, carsick, cello, copy, crime, drawing, fear, instrument, jail, life, lucario, memories, orchestra, overcrowding, pokemon, retirement, sydney

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