Blood crosses. They happen when siblings, or cousins, or some other kind of relatives have children together. It's something that disturbs me a bit. I suppose you could fall in love with a relative, but it's a bit frightening what things could happen as a result of such a relationship.

I heard mention of it in the book called The Story of Edgar Sawtelle, by David Wroblewski. The Sawtelles, the family upon which the book focuses, keep careful records of every dog they have bred so that no dog will have a blood cross. Blood crosses have sometimes resulted in physical defects, both in animals and in people.

I was reading National Geographic not that long ago (it is one of my favorite magazines, after all, and I renew my subscription every time it runs out) and apparently it seems that King Tut may have been the result of crossed blood...And that could be why he is pictured with a cane (had some sort of foot problem from the blood cross, perhaps? And maybe he had a weak immune system, too, which would have contributed to his death at such a young age). Among royalty it isn't uncommon to have blood crosses. Sometimes it's to preserve political power (which confuses me a little, because if you wanted to be more powerful, wouldn't it be better to marry someone out of your family so you would have more connections? But oh well) and other times people do fall in love with their family members.

There was also a guy who was French royalty who had crossed blood flowing in him and he developed slowly (I think he couldn't walk until 7? Or something freaky like that) and he didn't live that long. Isn't that painful? The odds are against you from birth. If you're the child of two relatives, then there's a possibility that both of them have a recessive gene that could cause problems, and if you happened to be unlucky enough, you might be born with those two recessive genes put together, and you would suffer from whatever problem the gene causes. And you'd be doomed to get cancer over and over again or die early, and so on. (Hmm, I suppose you could end up with such genes even if you didn't have crossed blood, but in that case you'd have to have two people meet who had some sort of similarities in genes, and I guess considering the amount of people out there it would happen, but then again there are a lot of combinations of genes that are possible, too...Well, never mind me, just talking to myself. Really. No one reads this besides my future self anyways.) I guess in that case you might not be able to change your fate. But I've heard this quote that "It's not the years in your life, it's the life in your years", so even if you know you don't have long to live, search for happiness. You're alive, so go and live as much as you can! That's still something I need to do.

I've been concerned about bloodlines because of my grandparents on my mother's side. People in China don't necessarily change their last names when they get married. In the case of my grandma, she already had the same last name as my grandpa, so there was no need to change last names. True, there are a lot of people in China, and you'll certainly meet people with the same last name, but it made me think that there's probably a blood cross, even if it's somewhere way back. A bit freaky to think about. One time I said to my mom, "So that's why you're so twisted!" (referring to her personality) which made her become indignant. XD But anyways, don't be like me, don't joke about it. "Do as I say, not as I do."

My science teacher showed us a website that contains a world clock. You can see births, deaths, illness, crimes, and whatnot. A bit morbid, I guess, watching as the number of deaths go up (there are really a lot of people who die of respiratory infections!) but it's kind of fascinating too. Here's the url:

http://www.poodwaddle.com/clocks/worldclock/

Labels: blood, book, clock, cross, death, family, genetics, health, life, national geographic, personality, problems, relatives, sickness, the story of edgar sawtelle, what if, world

When I was younger, I would always sleep without socks on. It felt too uncomfortable to me, wearing socks to bed. On hot days, I even stuck my bare feet out of the side of the blanket just to keep them feeling cool. This went on for many years, even in the winter, when my feet became all cold and numb. I didn't like the alien feeling I got from wearing socks.

But that has changed this past winter. My blood circulation has not been good. (At least, that is the theory that my mom and I have; if you have a better idea, you should let me know.) My body temperature isn't always as it should be. When the weather is cold I cannot seem to keep my body heat unless I am wearing a thick jacket (and even then sometimes it's not enough). My hands would be icy cold while my parents' hands would be quite warm. One of my classmates was surprised that I was wearing a jacket since she thought it was pretty warm. I myself am shocked to see students wearing t-shirts and shorts even on chilly days. (In fact, in elementary school, we would joke that one kid never wore anything besides t-shirts and shorts, winter or summer.)

My feet were really feeling too cold, so I decided it was better that I wear socks to bed. At first it felt all wrong, but after a while I got used to the feeling, and so it became a habit of mine. In fact, it feels a little odd not wearing socks. But since the weather is really warm, I figure it's better to sleep with socks off again for the time being.

I kept realizing right after I turned off the lights that I had forgotten to put on socks before bed. But it's such a hassle turning the lights on again and getting up to get socks. My mom says that I should just keep socks under my pillow. She said that she did that when she was young. I've been thinking to myself that maybe she didn't have teeth to give the tooth fairy, so she left socks instead. That makes it the Sock Fairy instead.

Recently I've been feeling some discomfort in my feet. The bottom of my left foot (specifically, the area known as the "ball" of the foot) pained me slightly during the day. I was still able to walk and run, but it sure made things uncomfortable. I looked at it at night and saw there was something like a blister on it. A dry, hard part of skin...Yikes. And then my other foot, the right foot is a bit odd around the ankle area (the side that is facing inward, facing to the left). It hurt me to bend it in a certain position, but only sometimes. At other times it is just fine. I keep wondering if perhaps I have injured myself without knowing it. Maybe I was sleeping in a really weird position. (I recall waking up some days with a stiff back or with pulled muscles from sleeping in a bad position.) Or maybe it's just one of those unexplainable aches that goes away after a while.

I've been stressed lately as well, due to a group project we have to do for language arts class (it's just so hard to meet up with my group members, so it's really bothering me). And I've also had to take quite a few tests. The STAR tests aren't really that big of a concern to me. But I have been taking awards tests. Since eighth grade is the last year of middle school, if you can show your excellence in a subject (essay writing, speech, poetry, mathematics, science, social studies, or art) you will be given an award. I was a bit reluctant to take a test for some of the subjects since I felt there was no way I would get the award (unless by some stroke of luck I managed to bubble in all the right answers, and it would be unfair for me to win the award when I didn't know what I was doing), but my mom urged me to, saying it would be a good experience and I might as well give it a try.

Well, the history was okay (though I didn't remember a lot, or didn't even know if I'd learned it), the science was tolerable, the essay writing was not too bad (just a bit of a time constraint)... But the geometry was something else. I could only understand how to do a few problems. Many of the things were either forgotten (like the formula for the volume of a cone or something along those lines) or I hadn't ever seen such a problem. These problems were beyond my abilities, so I ended up having to bubble in randomly at the end of class. (I should have taken Mr. Kulla's advice to just skip what I didn't understand immediately. I actually heard the problems at the end of the test were a bit easier...) Anyways, I am a little upset because I feel I had wasted a perfectly good hour of my time on taking a test that just ended up confusing me, but I suppose there's no use crying over spilled milk.

Labels: academic, awards, blood, circulation, discomfort, eighth grade, feet, geometry, health, luck, pain, pillow, problem, school, sleep, socks, STAR testing, temperature, test, tooth fairy

Uh, no, I haven't been trying to mix blood and water together in a glass or something like that, don't worry. I'm not one of those people who does things at home when they were told "don't try this at home".

What I mean by blood is heritage. Genes. Posterity. The person or people that will carry your torch when you no longer can. For several years, I have thought that if I decide to raise children, I want one of them to be an adopted child. I once said so to my grandmother, and she reacted in a way that I found strange. She seemed repelled by the idea, even a bit angry. Back then, I didn't know why. But earlier today, my mom gave me some information.

My mom said she didn't understand why I wanted an adopted child. "If you want children, couldn't you have some of your own?" she asked. (She thinks it's reasonable for people to adopt children if they are unable to get pregnant.) Personally, I think adopting children is good because...

1. I read somewhere that siblings that aren't related by blood get along better. (That means I could have one child of my own, and adopt one child.) I think that's good, if it's true, because kids often feel unhappy or underappreciated if they are compared to their siblings. One of my friends says she feels her mother is easier on her sister. I don't want my children to treat each other badly and resent each other.

2. It is helpful in reducing world population. If I had a child, I'd be adding to it, but if I adopted one, the population wouldn't change because that child is "already there". I'm really upset about overpopulation. In fact, I sometimes think of drastic schemes to reduce it. (Like researching diseases and creating or finding one that could just infect people I don't like, and not hurt others. This way criminals and people with irksome personalities could be removed. But I guess then someone would say, "You have to give them a second chance! They can change!")

3. Orphans seem more exciting. Probably actual orphans would find this offensive since it is not a good thing to lose your parents (unless they were really terrible ones). But still, you see orphans in books and movies and all, and that is because they're more interesting. Imagine, if I had an adopted child who was orphaned, they could write something dramatic for their college application.

Then I asked my mom what my grandma found wrong with adoption. My mother responded that it was simply the old beliefs of China. Bloodline is very important (such as having sons to pass on your last name) and so having an adopted child isn't good since they have, really, no relation in genetics (unless you were to adopt a relative, or something?). Also, my mom said that sometimes adopted children lead troubled lives. She knows someone who adopted a child who sometimes gets very angry and needs to be taken to the hospital to be calmed down.

The problems started with acne. The boy reached the age where he was going through puberty. His mother figured it was okay to let it be since his father had acne when he was that age and had grown out of it. However, although his parents didn't mind his face because he was, after all, their son, the boy feared that his classmates would keep away from him because of the acne on his face. He grew very sensitive about it and resented his parents for not taking him to a doctor (I mean, then he could've gotten some medicine. I heard his acne was pretty bad, worse than average) and even struck his mother. Sometimes he would get into a real frenzy and he'd be taken to the hospital to be electrocuted or some other cruel and unusual thing to calm him down. But such effects are only temporary, after all, and so he also grew to hate the hospital because of what was done to him there.

This did make me a bit more wary, but I still will not change my mind about wanting to adopt a child. I think this kind of situation can be prevented if you are very aware of what your child is thinking. I know probably even if a mother asked her child what he or she did at school, he or she might still respond, "Oh, nothin'," or "the usual". Even if it makes you appear bossy and annoying, you should try to worm it out of your child. You should keep everything out in the open in your family. But don't tell your child's problems to other people. Otherwise, I bet anyone would feel like they have to keep things to themselves if they don't want the whole world, or at least the people whose opinions they care about, to know.

Hmm, I haven't decided where to adopt a child, though. Maybe I'll go to China and adopt one of the young girls there. (There are more girls in orphanages and stuff than boys, because you can only have one child in China unless you pay the fine or something, and people prefer to have a son. Especially in the countryside, because sons will stay and work, but girls will marry off) I mean, I might even be able to find someone who looked like me. (But then it would be harder to explain to them that they are adopted since they'd be saying, "What? But I look like Mommy" or "I don't remember any other parents")

Labels: acne, adoption, blood, children, china, daughter, disease, family, lineage, orphan, parents, population, pregnancy, problem, relationship, relatives, rivalry, secret, siblings, water

This has nothing to do with how children used to quit school around the age of 12 and go work in mills, where they would get into some tragic accident, like being maimed by a machine gone rogue. (I'm glad to see child labor is forbidden now. However, I wanted to work during the summer, so I can save up cash, but was never able to because I was too young.) Instead, the children are the very same people I go to school with.

I am always really paranoid when we're playing sports in PE. I've had bad luck over the years, what with various projectiles hitting me in the head. The first time I remember was back in 1st grade. Ironically, it happened while I was trying to do something good. I saw a ball that had rolled under a bush and was stooping to pull it out when a football came from behind and hit me in the head.

I can't remember much of the other incidents, except for the ones in middle school. I was played lacrosse, which is one of my favorite sports, actually, and I got whacked in the face with a ball. That was bad enough, but in the same day I was also hit in the leg. During this school year, we were playing volleyball and a volleyball that had strayed from a different court hit me in the head. (As far as I know I have not gotten a concussion from all the pounding my head has received, but I could've lost some brain cells. Terrible.)

I still can't really figure out how to hit a volleyball correctly. The few times that I successfully hit it, I usually hit it around my wrist area, which makes it sore and red. I am afraid I will injure myself if this keeps up. What part am I supposed to use to hit the volleyball? (Basketball is easier for me than this, at least I can catch the ball, even if that makes my hands dry and dusty.)

For some reason, whenever I am in a certain PE teacher's class, I always get injured once. When I had him in 7th grade, I twisted my ankle because I was rushing while doing warm-up exercises, and then I tripped and landed rather awkwardly. (You would think I would have learned my lesson, but I still rush when warming up. Not a good idea, so I advise you "don't try this at home".) The other time I was injured was last trimester, when I was trying to get up the stairs quickly but didn't lift my leg high enough on a step and fell, scraping my knee. I didn't feel any pain at first, so I didn't realize it was bleeding until it was pointed out to me. It started to sting after a while when I was putting water on it. It kept on bleeding, which is disturbing. Eventually I went off to get a bandage so it would stop bleeding.

I guess I'm not doing as badly as others, though. One day, at brunch, I noticed my current PE teacher pushing a kid in a wheelchair to the school office. A teacher called out to him, "Stop hurting the kids!" in a joking manner. However, I suspect a lot of people get injured in his class. We used to have two students who were in some way or another unable to do certain activities. One of the students isn't in the class anymore, though the other still is, but she does exercises with a medicine ball.

Despite my paranoid tendencies, I've always dreamed of having an exciting life, like living in a new place, or living a life fraught with danger, such as going sky diving often or rounding up mustangs (...are there still any mustangs out there?). I'd like to try going in a hot air balloon someday or going surfing. There's a lot of things I want to do, and so I feel frustrated at times because I believe that my life isn't thrilling enough. And at other times, I am too lazy and I just like it the way it is. I wonder if I might have multiple personalities or if it simply depends on my mood. (For instance, I am overall more of a pessimist than an optimist, though I can be either. If I have just suffered from many bad scores in a row in school, then I'll be pessimistic, but after a while I start to have hope again, and become more optimistic. After all, I really hate it when people act like all hope is lost, so I would be a hypocrite if I acted like that myself, so my consciousness gives me "pep talks".)

I crave some more ordinary freedoms, too, like being allowed to wander in the neighborhood by myself. I can only go outside for a short distance (like maybe across a street or two) and for a short time without supervision. When I was young, I always thought my parents were overprotective. I wasn't allowed to walk home until 7th grade and even then I always walked with my grandma (and later my acquaintance/friend/neighbor/companion? I can't come up with the right term). I felt that I was deprived of things, and I still am not allowed to ride a bike home. Although my parents' grip on me slackens over time as I supposedly mature (who knows if I really do? D: ), riding a bike home is still something I am not supposed to do. (But then again, it's also inconvenient. I would have to put my bike in the car when my parents drive me to school; Besides, I'm not really a great biker, even if I can ride a bike. I fell of my bike recently because I saw someone else coming and panicked, trying to give them space. And when low branches stick out over the sidewalk, I panic, and try to swerve, but then I fall off)

I once read an article in the Time magazine about how parents are really overprotective nowadays. The percentage of students walking or biking to school dropped, despite the fact that crime rates have gone down, so it's safer nowadays. And some parents are really focused on what's "best" for their children, which could mean making them study a lot, and asking schools to have more classes and less free time (sometimes this means not having as much PE, too, hence higher rates of obesity). Even though parents care a lot about their kids, it seems it can sometimes harm them rather than helping them. Will you really be fine when you are independent if you are used to being taken care of by my your mother and father? (Not a good thing if you run home every week to make them do your laundry for you. Of course, there might be shared washing machines available for you to use) Is keeping a tight leash on people good for their lives or will it stunt their growth? The key is to find the right balance between the two. To know when to let your kids decide for themselves (and maybe learn the hard way, but that's life) and when you should direct them...It's a tough judgment call.

Labels: bike, blood, child cruelty, danger, head, injury, job, life, optimism, overprotective, parents, pessimism, physical education, sports, success, time, walk

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